Sleep
Moving from Cot to Bed (Without Losing Bedtime)
5 min read
The cot is a wonderful piece of equipment because it's a boundary that requires no enforcement. The night you take it away, bedtime becomes something your child can opt out of by simply standing up — which is why this transition undoes so many routines that were working fine.
It goes better when it's late, unhurried, and boring.
Later is usually better
There's rarely a prize for moving early. Many children do well staying in a cot until three or so, and the transition is much easier once they can understand and remember a rule about staying in bed. The genuine reasons to move are safety — repeated climbing out — or a real need for the cot.
If a new baby is coming, either move them a couple of months before the birth or wait several months after. Doing it the same week means the bed change and the sibling arrive as one event.
Change one thing
Keep everything else identical: same room, same position if you can, same bedding, same comfort object, same routine and story count. A new bed plus a new room plus potty training plus starting preschool is four changes, and the sleep is what pays for them.
Set the rule before the first night
- Say the rule in daylight, simply: "When you're in your bed, you stay in your bed until morning. If you need me, call and I'll come."
- Practice it once during the day, cheerfully — getting in, lying down, you leaving, you coming back.
- Run the normal bedtime routine that evening, nothing special. Excitement about the bed is not your friend at 7pm.
- Make the room safe on the assumption they will get up: furniture anchored, stair gate, nothing reachable that shouldn't be.
When they keep getting up
Expect it, and make it dull. Walk them back with minimal talk, minimal eye contact, and the same short phrase every time — "It's sleep time, back to bed." The first few nights can involve a lot of repetitions. The tedium is the method: any conversation, negotiation, or irritation is more interesting than lying still in the dark.
Head off the usual reasons in advance: water on the nightstand, last bathroom trip built into the routine, hugs at the end of the goodnight ritual rather than available on request.
Keep the story exactly where it was
The story is the part of the routine your child recognizes most, so it should survive the furniture change untouched — same number, same place in the order, same ending. If anything, this is a good fortnight to be generous with the reading and strict about everything after it.
Common questions
- When should a toddler move from a cot to a bed?
- There's no need to rush — many children stay in a cot until around three. The real triggers are safety, particularly repeated climbing out, or needing the cot for a new baby.
- How do I stop my toddler getting out of their new bed?
- State the rule during the day, then walk them back every single time with almost no talking and the same short phrase. Keeping it boring is the method — conversation and negotiation are more interesting than lying in the dark.
- Should I move my toddler to a bed before a new baby arrives?
- Either a couple of months before the birth or several months after. Doing it in the same weeks means the bed change and the new sibling land as a single upheaval.
Tonight's story, ready to read
Original illustrated bedtime stories for ages 2+, by a professional narrator or in your own recorded voice. Some are free — no account needed.